Ethan ran to the mailbox. It was empty. He knew this was the signal telling him to go to his room. He didn’t care. He was quite pleased with himself and how funny he was.
On his way back through the kitchen to his room, Ethan caught some conversation about how Abigail should show Ben her paintings in her room. This gave Ethan an excellent idea.
When Ethan was 6, he figured out that if he climbed onto the shelf in his closet, he could push the ceiling tile up and crawl onto the shelf in Abby’s closet! No one knew he figured this out, he employed his Dork Stealth powers.
Ethan was bigger now. It had been years since he had tried climbing into his sister’s closet. Maybe he was still small enough to fit. He hadn’t grown that much in the last six years.
Ethan went to his room, pulled his desk chair by his closet, cleared some room on the shelf, and slowly slid up, making sure it would hold him. He fit, but not by much. Ethan pushed the ceiling tile up, cleared a space on Abby’s shelf, and climbed onto it. He lay there giggling to himself. “This is awesome,” he whispered. Once again, Ethan was quite pleased with himself.
About two minutes later, Abby and Ben entered Abby’s room. “So, that wasn’t too embarrassing, was it?” Abigail asked.
“No, it wasn’t bad at all. Your family is funny. Your brother is crazy.”
“Yeah, he’s a definite weirdo.”
“That’s funny that he delivers our paper.” Ben said.
“That is.” Abby said. They both stood there, not knowing what to say next. “So, yeah, here are my paintings.” Abby said while pointing to the paintings on the wall.
“Wow, those are great. You did all these?”
“Are they like paint-by-number or something?”
“Whatever, Ben,” Abby said, punching him on the shoulder.
“They are really cool. And those are your soccer trophies there.”
“Yeah, most of those are from a long time ago. I don’t even know why I still have them.”
“You are one talented chick.”
At this point, just when it was getting good, Ethan noticed the shelf was tipping. Everything slowed down. Slow motion always occurs right when you are about to die. Ethan could feel his balance being thrown off. The shelf slid. Ethan slid. Ethan and the shelf slid together. He was going down.
Ethan pulled off an impressive physical maneuver, turning his body while the shelf slid down. Somehow, on Ethan’s way down, his shirt got stuck on a hook on the wall, so while the entire shelf and its contents spilled onto the floor, pushing the closet door open, Ethan hung by his shirt, his feet one foot off the ground.
“Hey, how’s it going?” Ethan said as nonchalantly as possible. “Nice evening for a date, eh?”
Abby was screaming. She screamed about Ethan, she screamed about all her stuff strewn about the floor, she screamed for her dad to get Ethan in trouble. Ben, meanwhile, was collapsed on the floor laughing his head off.
Ethan hung silently, smiling, wondering what was going to happen next. He soon found out. He got in pretty big trouble. He received a nice lecture. He was told that he would pay for a new shelf for Abby, and also pay to replace or fix whatever he broke in her room. That was going to hurt.
Ethan went to bed. Sometimes even dorky dorks know when to call it a day.
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